All Part of Growing Up

Gabriela has reached the wonderful age in which not only am I her entire world, but that she misses me when I'm not around.  She doesn't like me to leave her, for whatever reason, for any amount of time.  She has once again entered the "separation anxiety" phase.

If I walk into another room, she toddles in behind, usually chattering away.  If I go upstairs, she fusses at me for a moment and then begins to follow me up.  If I go into the bathroom and close the door, she stands in the hallway and whines until I come back to her.  Leaving her with a sitter results in demonstrative wails at the top of her lungs, hands extended toward me, hoping I will swoosh her back into my arms and stay with her.

Once she realizes I'm gone, Gabriela is just fine.  She plays contentedly and has a blast.  I've done what all mothers secretly do; I've watched her from afar without her seeing me.  So I know she's not truly damaged by my leaving.  She knows deep inside that I would never intentionally put her in a place of danger and that I would leave her with ones I trust to care for her. 

She also recognizes the difference between me leaving her safely and her leaving me.  At this stage in her life, it's not safe for her to go far on her ow accord, as she's not old enough to be able to make good judgments.  But one day, hard as it may be to imagine, she will go off in a life of her own, outside of my guardianship.  I hope that when she does, she will take all I have attempted to teach her, and make wise decisions. 

It's a normal part of growing up.  We learn where a security lies and we decide that is where we need to stay.  We don't want that source of security to leave us. But learning how to deal with life outside of those comforts is also a natural part of maturing.  The peace comes when we realize that our relationship with those sources of security is solid enough that a mutual trust has been built up and we can always rely on the one who has held us and cared for us through all of life's matters.

Only when the baby bird leaves the nest can she learn how to soar on eagles' wings.