No Bus

Ever since last Christmas, Benjamin has been begging to go to school.  I worked with him at home, but he wanted to go to class like his big brother and sister.  We thought he might have been able to go this past spring, but things didn't quite work out.  So, impatiently, he had to wait until this school year.

Excitingly for our family, this year Nathaniel and Nyssa are finally able to attend the same school, riding the same bus.  Benjamin, however, just going into Pre-Kindergarten, is attending a child development center that houses a Georgia Lottery funded program.  Since his birthday is in October, he is one of the oldest in his class, and he is ready to do everything big brother and sister will be doing.

All summer I have tried to prepare him for school.  I have told him of circle time and recess, class reading and snack time.  It's done wonders for his potty training!  But there is one thing missing from his school that the other children have.  He has been longing to ride the bus like them, but I have tried to prepare him for the fact that there will be no bus for him this year.  I will be taking him to school.  O course, he was focused on all the fun and heard what he wanted to hear.

Sure enough, the time came this past Monday morning.  It was the first day of school!  N & N put on their backpacks, so he put on his a swell.  He knew he was going to a different school than they, so he was content to walk to the bus stop with the three of us and let them climb aboard the school bus without him.  He waved good-bye and walked back to the house with me.

He was content as I went into the house to grab my keys and my purse, but when I moved toward the minivan, he turned into a different child.  Jr. Mr. Hyde took over my dear little Benjamin. 

"What are you doing?" he yelled, horrified.

"I'm unlocking the door to take you to school."

"But I want to ride the bus."

"Benjamin," I began calmly, " There is no bus for you, Honey.  Remember?"

"But I don't want to ride the minivan.  I want to ride in the bus!"

At this point, he went into full temper tantrum mode.  He flailed his arms and kicked and started whining even more.  " I. I. I want to ride on the bus.  I want the bus, not the car, the bus!"

Now, this boy is getting too old for this, so I wasn't about to put up with this lack of control, though I did understand his frustration.  So I took a breath, kept my voice low, and rubbed his shoulders gently for just a moment.

"Benjamin, there is no bus coming for you.  If you don't get into the minivan, I guess you can't go to school."

Faced with that possible inevitability, my son immediately straightened up and decided he could ride in the minivan after all.  I was very proud of the way that he managed to gather his control and climb sweetly in the vehicle.  We had a nice conversation about a good way to treat others and how to be willing to handle new situations.  We talked about how much fun the day would go and, indeed,  he had a wonderful first day of school.

Sometimes when we embark on a new journey, we have certain expectations.  When we come to situations where things aren't going the way we expect, we have to choose how we will respond.  We can kick and scream, throwing our tantrums, or we can just sit and enjoy the unexpected.  Sometimes the journey itself is as meaningful as the destination...and once we get there, we can smile, because we will have composed ourselves with dignity and integrity along the ride.