True Friendships

Some things never change.  When I was in school, it was all a popularity contest.  Who had the most friends, who could get the dates with the hot guys in school, who could play sports the best, and who had the most friends.  Oh.  Wait.  I said that already, didn't I?  But things are different now because we're all grown up and in the big world.

Enter Facebook, the phenomenon that has swept the internet world.  It connects people with acquaintances from their past, gives them someone to talk with who has similar interests, and creates a social network for anyone who is willing to stay on the computer for umpteen hours a day.  Oh, and it allows people to meet others from all around the world.  It's one big social network.  It's true.  That's why Hollywood made the movie about Facebook called The Social Network.

It's great, truly it is.  It allows people who may not be able to socialize well in the outside world an opportunity to have contact with others.  It gives old childhood buddies a chance to reunite and reminisce.  It even has games that allow people who would never have met otherwise the chance to get to know one another.

But then again, it's all about popularity.  I currently have over 850 "friends" on Facebook.  But let's take a look at what a friend really is.  I've heard of different types of friends.  You have the fair weather friend, the fun friend, the serious friend, the tried and true friend, and the parasitic friend.  But there's a big difference between having an acquaintance with someone and being a real friend.

A friend is there for you, not just because they get something from you, but because they care for you as a person.  A friend wants what is best for you.  A friend will understand when you get angry, will listen to your tirades.  A friend will rejoice with you and cry with you.   A friend will stop to smell the roses with you or help get you back on track when you've digressed along a rabbit trail.

Growing up, I was a typical "Josie Grossie," if you've ever seen the movie Never Been Kissed.  I knew lots of people, but hardly any of them could be called friends.  In some ways it was my fault as much as it was theirs, but because of that, I have learned the value of friendship.  I wrote a poem about it in high school.

At the time I wrote my poem, True Friendships, to my best friend, we had known each other for over a decade.  We still keep in touch, though not as often as we'd like.  But we do know that we can count on each other and every time we pick up the phone, it's as if no time has passed.  Her oldest is now graduated from high school, her youngest around 8, one year older than my oldest.  My world is so much better because of her!

A true friendship isn't just automatic.  It is tried, tested, and endures many hardships.  A true friendship lasts through the pain, hurt, and anger.  It looks past mistakes and forgives.  It, forgive the cliche', passes the test of time.

I have read before that there is no greater love than that a man lay down his life for a friend.  This last weekend, a teenager did just that.  There was a group of kids playing in the neighborhood, she among them.  A SUV careened out of control and she yelled for all of them to get out of its way.  She made sure that they all got to safety.  In the process, this 13 year old girl's last actions were to get the last of them away from danger.  Unfortunately, it was too late for her.  The driver rammed the vehicle into the building, sandwiching her.  She died, not immediately, but right there, at the very place where several children had just been.  When it counted, she took action.  She was the very definition of a true friend.